V. Melissa Abdouch of Mei Mei’s Cookies & Creamery Defining: A Life Well Lived

I live each day with the intention of being the best me I can be and finding joy in all the things, big and small.

Owning a cookie shop, cafe, or bakery was not something I had ever considered in my 43 years of living. It wasn't that I was opposed to it, clearly since that's where I stand now, but it was not a focus of my life. I was thriving as an International Finance Liaison, learning and growing every day. I loved what I did so much, I nearly moved across the country to immerse myself further in the industry.

Rewinding to 1976, when I was two, the doctors gave my parents the worst news they could have imagined. They were told I had stage IV neuroblastoma (cancer of the nervous system) and was not expected to live more than a month post diagnosis. The cure rate was ZERO. Rejecting the doctor's suggestion of taking me home and letting me live out my final days there with family, they pushed for a treatment plan and insisted the doctors fight for my life. That sort of defiance has been my general attitude towards life ever since. If I wanted to truly live my life, I was not going to allow statistics or others tell me what is or is not possible. 

Since kicking the incurable cancer to the curb, I have defied all the odds. I grew to be a healthy cancer free adult, I graduated high school and then college, I served in the US Air Force as a linguist which required a waiver from the surgeons general, I had three children (who come home each Sunday for family dinner), held a successful career in international finance, and now I am a third generation entrepreneur who finds joy each day in serving others. I have also survived hardships like assault, divorce, unemployment, depression, and a global pandemic two years into opening a new business to name a few. The common thread across all these life episodes is the people I choose to surround myself with. These are the people I can celebrate successes with and who support me when needed. Choosing these people is also an intentional act, as is removing those who do not serve my wellbeing.

Without a doubt, owning Mei Mei's has given me a sense of joy and accomplishment unlike any other. In addition to allowing me to live a life of purpose and growth, I am fortunate to share that with others. There is the obvious manner of sharing knowledge with my staff and supporting them in finding joy in what they do, but I also teach them concepts that are just as good outside the shop as they are inside. Direct communication is the quickest way to gain the results you seek, so say exactly what you mean and ask for exactly what you want. Integrity is the most fragile character trait and most difficult to rebuild, protect yours by using it regularly. Humility is the strongest character trait and becomes stronger and easier to display the more we express it. Most things in life are multidimensional. Making cookies is not just following a recipe, it's an art form, it's science, and it is a way to share joy with others. Completing a checklist is not just doing your job, it is an accomplishment and self rewarding. Engaging with customers is not just a job function, it's a way to build connections with others and gain confidence in yourself. Everything we do affects others, try to make it positive. I am not sure I would find many employees if I actually listed these things in the job description.

I am fortunate to live a life and hold a career that brings me joy, supports my wellbeing and mental health, and allows me to live a life with intention to share that with others. I get to wake each day knowing I have the ability to love and support others through the food I make, services I provide, actions that I take, and connections I make. Individuals who come through my doors are encouraged to be their authentic selves without risk of being shamed. Those who struggle financially are able to come in and enjoy a free cup of coffee and cookie from the Kindness Cookie Jar. When individuals enter my shop, they are treated as friends first and customers second. When I ask you how your day is, I am truly interested in hearing how your day is. I will rejoice in your good days and be there to listen on the days you are struggling. 

Allow me to wrap up by sharing with you the advice I share with classrooms I speak in. No job or person is beneath you. Those who perform tasks we don't want to perform, allow us the time to focus on the tasks we do. Appreciate them for allowing you the opportunity to do so. You have the ability to be the positive in the world. Live your life with this intent and you will be.